Writing: Zombie Game.

Last summer I got an idea for a short film and quickly sketched out some scenes. I never really finished writing it, so here it is.

1.
Gross Guy: *with a bottle of beer in one hand and a bottle of Bawls in the other* I will destroy you undead pissheads! I am Wilhelm the Great!

Girl: Can't you do something about that guy?

Narrator: *Shakes head* Once the game is on, the game is on.

Girl: But he's . . .

Narrator: Disgusting? Be glad he's on the human's side. He might be the last one standing.

2.
Narrator: Every day, students on campus are killed. Some will rise again, but if we're lucky, they will walk no more.

*A crowded hallway. Students bearing backpacks and books mill past each other, awkwardly shoving. A tough-looking guy with a goatee and a red bandanna tied around his short black hair sees a thin, pale guy with a green bandanna amble past. The red guy's eyes widen and he pulls a water gun out of his waistband, turns and aims it dramatically and shoots. The green guy, hit with a stream of water, moans piteously.*

Narrator: And you learn--life as a college student sucks, but death as a college student, that's not so bad. *The narrator grins at the camera, affixes a green bandanna to his head, and steps outside.*

3.
*A man sits high up on a building--on a balcony or something, with one of those extreme water guns affixed to a tripod. He scans the people below with binoculars and spots one with a green bandanna. He aims with the water gun and shoots--but ti's not extreme enough, and the water falls far short of its mark, sprinkling gently onto passersby below. He looks disappointed, until he hears a shuffling behind him. He turns and grabs the gun, tripod and all, and screams as he wildly shoots the green-bandannaed person with water.

4.
Narrator: You can't stop it, man. Once the game starts, it never stops. Just look at it. Look around you. Every day there's more and more people wearing bandannas. They weren't there when it started. People choose to play.

5.
*Man on balcony/rooftop is assembling a giant slingshot. He peers through the binoculars, finds a green target, and shoots a water balloon. The zombie falls forward from the impact and water gushes around him.

Sniper: Yes.

6.
*text: Police Beat--an unidentified suspect has been bombing the student body with water balloons.*

7.
*The tough goateed guy is getting undressed in his dorm. He pulls off his black t-shirt. There is a white chalk X on the back.*

Tough Guy: Noooo!

8.
Narrator: At first the complaint was that the humans had a huge advantage over the zombies. But that's the way it is. Zombies can't hurt you until they're up close. A human's best defense is a long-range weapon. That's just how it goes.

9.
*At a store, the tough guy glances around nervously, at a register, paying for a green bandanna.

10.
Narrator: Am I afraid I'll get caught? No--no one knows who I am. As far as they know, I'm zedhed33. I post only from public campus computers. It may have been my idea, but as far as anyone else is concerned, I'm just another player.

11.
Narrator: *VO* Does college life leave you feeling drained, tired, braindead? Do you meander aimlessly, vaguely yearning for something you don't have? Do you often find yourself thinking that everything would be much better if you could just consume the knowledge of others? Help is on the way. Introducing Undeath. Ask yourself is Undeath is right for you.

*Twisted, weird angles, weird lighting, messed up framerate shots of people shuffling along in masses. Staring blankly ahead in class. A teacher calls on someone and they let out a long, low groan. Then a shot of a green-bandannaed person and a red-bandannaed person, normal two shot, normal colors. The red person has their hands in the air, mouth open and eyes wide in a pantomimic expression of shock, as the green person, with large dramatic movements, draws an X in chalk on the red person's chest. The camera slowly pans into a closeup on the red person as the colors become messed up so the red bandanna appears green.*

12.
*Dean's office.*

Dean: So why have you been terrorizing the school with water balloons?

*Pause.*

Sniper: Zombies.

Dean: *eyes narrow* Zombies?

Sniper: Uh huh.

13.
*Dean's office.*
Dean: Look out there, just look! It's chaos! I will not have this happening at my school!

*Through the large window, the student body can be seen walking about, looking fairly calm and normal. When the Dean turns away from the window, a boy outside gets taken out by a water balloon, falling forward into a large person in front of him. The large person, taking this as an unnecessary affront, turns and decks the soaking offender. This evolves pretty quickly into a large brawl. The Dean continues talking, unaware of what's going on behind him.*

Dean: This calls for drastic security measures. We need a campus-wide prohibition of water weapons. And furthermore, we will find out who's behind this zombie nonsense.

Other guy: What makes you think this wasn't just one kid performing a prank?

Dean: College kids don't do pranks, officer. They get drunk and have wild, kinky, non-committal sex. Those bastards.


And that's about as far as I got. If I could just tack some kind of ending onto this thing it would be close enough to an actual script. But whatever.